The following is from the book "First There Is A Mountain" by Wayne Austin. EM is short for "Ego Mind" or who one *thinks* one is.
EM: Peace! Peace!!! What can possibly be more Peaceful than nothing, pure, pristine Nothing-ness? Millions, billions, are searching for Peace and will continue to search on for what is right here: Nothing. To be sure, they can find relative peace (small “p”) but this peace is bogus, not bad but bogus, as are all temporary things.
You Know this. Just stop for a fraction of a second - even if you don't stop, you can still Realize Peace. You can Realize this “Nothingness” can't you? Sure you can. And with this Realization of Nothing you have Realized Peace. It's easier than easy. All that has happened is that you have been fooled into thinking that Peace has some qualities, some makeup, but Nothing is no thing; Peace is Peace. And when this is pointed out many people go, “Oh, I know that, but I'm looking for Peace”. :))
WAYNE:We are surrounded by Nothing, but we don't notice it because we are focused on what is contained in it. Nothing (Peace) contains all things, all phenomena. You can't hear Peace, sound is contained in Peace. You can't see Peace, seeing is contained in Peace. Isn't this obvious to you? Isn't it obvious that every thing is surrounded by Nothing? And isn't it further obvious that Nothing permeates every thing? We are surrounded and permeated by Peace!
This is good news but very bad news for EM. EM wants Peace to be some thing. EM wants Peace to be some thing so it can find it. EM wants to be the hero of the search by finding Peace. EM will never find Peace; and the earlier it (you) realize this, the better, because then the search is over. Who would continue to search when whatever one is searching for is found?
As we said yesterday, EM cannot find Peace, because EM is always moving; it must move in order to be itself. When it does not move as in deep sleep it doesn't exist. Deep sleep is Peace; nothing is going on. (An aside: A few years ago the “Talking Heads” had a song called “Heaven” and one of the lines is, “Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens.”...) But nothing happening is pure hell for EM.
You don't need to take my word for it; since you are EM, you know that nothing is equated with boredom. You don't want to live in a world where nothing ever happens, do you? :)) The good news is that in this world, things happen all the time, and that is the dream, the illusion that we live in. There are some who live in this world with both feet, they enjoy the beauty and the pain, because they Know it is a dream contained in Nothing.
I am not in a hurry to end this life. I enjoy this life and one day it will be over and Wayne will be no more. What will happen to him? Nothing. :)) Sort of like smoke, we can watch smoke rise in the air and then it just disappears. Can we gather it back together again and sort of stuff it back into the piece of burning wood from which it came? Of course not. The wood is ashes and the smoke is gone, absorbed into the air. It is in Nothing.
So EM really resists Nothing, but EM (you) can live completely at ease with Nothing (you already do), in fact you can bring Nothing into your consciousness and begin to refer off of it. By this you can begin to Know (without evidence, and evidence is only required by EM) that who you are in Truth is Nothing. (Even calling yourself Nothing is a sort of affront to EM). But as you begin to Know that who you are, is That which is always Present (you do know that Nothing is always present don't you?), :) this Knowing will become stronger and stronger, not to you as EM, but to itSelf.
Self begins to Know Self. Or in Biblical terms, the Son (self) begins to Know the Father (Self). (In the background I can hear all of my old friends over at the ACIM prison saying, “But that's not what the Course says”.) ;)
Put your attention on Nothing and see what happens... or doesn't. :)
EM: If I empty everything out of this universe, I would be creating separateness.
WAYNE:Yes, if you could, you would have to be separate, that is impossible.
EM: What I am coming to is, it is impossible for humans to enter emptiness because emptiness is part of the whole. Yes, there is dual, but dual is part
of the whole. What I am saying is the source gave birth to emptiness, emptiness gave birth to one, one gives birth to two, etc, etc.
WAYNE:Yes dual is part of the whole just as separate is. However, “Source” can also be known as “Emptiness”, but it is not the emptiness that we have a concept of. Emptiness, which is the same as Source, IS everything AND nothing. It is all things and yet nothing at all. All things are dependent upon It, but IT is not dependent upon anything at all.
EM: We are the birth, the death, as all births and deaths of all things.
WAYNE:Yes.
EM: The difference is that we try to create a difference. I know the mind is constantly feeding to make us feel separate, but this is dual also, and dual is part of the whole.
WAYNE:Yes, nothing is separate from Source. The mind creates illusion, and this illusion is also part of Source.
EM: So the source is everything, everything is the source; it is impossible to separate from.
WAYNE:Yes, All is well. :)
EM: So really the most that I can possibly do is be a part of a natural flow.
WAYNE:Yes, you have no choice other than to do what you do. To do what you do can also be called the “natural flow”. But beware of words as “flow” implies movement, and all movement is illusion. There is no place to move to. Stillness Is. :)
EM: This is interesting, but stopping/being still might make it easier to realize, maybe? Funny this peace is just the absence of something. I always thought that the peace would be euphoric, but that would still be something, wouldn’t it? Can Nothing be noticed; can it be focused on?
WAYNE:Yes, euphoria is something; it is a quality that needs a body to manifest. Obviously, Peace is not euphoria; otherwise it would not be Peace – it would be euphoria. :)) But most people think Peace has qualities such as euphoria or joy or some such thing.
Peace cannot be focused on in the way we think it, because that kind of
focusing needs a body/mind. (As when we “concentrate”.) Nevertheless, Peace can be Realized. Realization is discovery; Peace was always there, just not noticed.
EM: Which comes back to stillness, this may sound crazy, but there are moments when I can kind of hear stillness, it’s like an expansive stillness that seems to come on the horizon, sounds crazy I know. I see myself as a kind of drama junkie, but again, maybe that's the Peace, in the absence of drama or something happening there is a kind of peace, but it’s not appreciated or valued until the drama gets out of control creating a lot of pain and suffering, then I want that peace back. This is usually the times when I find myself praying “Oh God make this go away, I promise I will never do this again”.
WAYNE:Watch out for making any promises such as “I will never do this again” - that is a sure way to do it again. :) You don't have to make any promises. What does an illusion do with a promise? :))
EM: Once I (EM) am Awakened, I will be capable of using the incumbent popularity to get and have as much sex as possible, because of my “secret powers”. People will be drawn to me, because of my gifts.
WAYNE:Now this is refreshing! :)) Yes, that's the come-on that EM uses frequently, especially with men, “I'll become a guru and then I'll have all the women vying for my sexual favors” (to put it politely). But I think you can see if you've only been here for a couple of weeks, that this is pure EM. EM only gives in order to get. Getting is the prime motivation for EM and of course getting means that you are controlling. Sex has been the downfall of many really good teachers. They get caught up in the adulation and can't resist.
But what is not seen by most is that all of this is a lesson in control and once one surrenders control then everything works out naturally and one need not be on the lookout for the sex monster to raise its ugly head (to coin a phrase). :)
So first things first - Realize Truth and then see whether sex is still a problem.
EM: And yet! Why become awakened at all if, in my model of reality, an Awakened man no longer needs sex, because he has God. So, I will continue
to utilize my “spiritual” sources, and put off finishing being me, because they do manifest some “animal magnetism” properties.
WAYNE:Show me an awakened man who no longer needs sex, and I will show you a man who is not awakened.
The above is taken from the book "First There Is A Mountain available in both printed and Kindle editions. Click on cover below to order your copy.